Saturday, 18 February 2012

Fools in love

Why do most girls remain in certain relationships that are either abusive or where the guy mistreats her, in the hope of being the one to change him/his ways? I don't get it. What makes you think you can change a wife beater or a cheat? We should all know by now that change comes from within, you can't change someone unless they are willing to change themselves. So stop lying to yourself in the name of love and know your self worth. If he's not treating you the right way quit telling yourself that one day he's gonna realise that you've been true to him despite his shortcomings and change for you, that's a 1 out of 10 possibility. You think the other girls before you didn't try to do that? I'm not perfect in relationships (heck I'm far from that) neither am I a pessimist nor am i a love guru, I've been in one of these where I dated a serial cheater and told myself one day he'd change till I realised he was actually changing me from a happy bunny to a sad depressed emo girl. If there is one thing in this world that i am sure of it's that Everyone deserves to be happy but if you think im gonna sit back and watch you Hurt yourself in a relationship that isnt worth it and say 'as long as it makes you happy' then you've come to the wrong place. You may think he makes you happy but he would never mistreat you that way if he knew your worth. You're priceless and that's how he should be treating you, if he's not gonna dp that then wait till the right one comes along to treat you like the princess you are. So be honest with yourselves, girls, why are you still hanging around? And don't give me that cock and bull story about love

Thursday, 16 February 2012

Why Bother Asking?

Why do we ask for advice when we aren't gonna take it? I wonder… Is it cause we don’t trust the voices in our heads telling us what to do, and would rather hear someone say it out loud? that way we would have someone to hold responsible when things go wrong or just cause we’re just too damn stubborn to do what is right even if it didn't come from our own brain? Or would it be because of the battle between the brain and the heart, where the brain tells you the right thing to do or what seems to be the sensible thing at that time but your heart is far too busy sticking its fingers in its ears and saying ‘la la la I can’t hear you’. I think we only ask so that someone can tell us our heart is right and our brain is wrong; that’s why when one person says something that sounds like the right thing we still go out of our way to ask others for their ‘advice’ till someone says what we want to hear. We ask for advice but we don’t really want it, we just want to be told we’re right; just to hear what soothes us best regardless of the fact that it might not be the ugly truth

Tuesday, 7 February 2012

The Bored Theory

Are you tired of the same old routine over and over again? Find yourself fed up with the same old constant pattern of doing things? Well I get bored easily and I'm all for change. This is where the bored theory comes in; it is about relationships and why they tend to fail most times. I call it the bored theory cause it is based on girls and how we're easily bored (everyone knows women get bored easily and if you didn't, now you do) plus it is easier for me to write from this POV considering I'm a girl :). I'm constantly changing my room arrangement cause I can't stand to see it the same way for too long, I recently cut my hair into a bob cause I was tired of the same ol' long do, I also had auburn spice highlights put in my hair and got a third ear piercing and this list could go on and on but sadly we are not here to talk about my fabulous self :p.

How come things seem more interesting at the beginning of a relationship than at the end? At first, we meet a guy, feelings grow, things work out well and bam! we're official. And then just cause you've gotten us you stop sending flowers, complimenting us, sending good morning text messages or watching our favourite TV shows. Finally we become an old boring couple with no spark or chemistry whatsoever, making people wonder why we're still together, kissing you feels like kissing dead cold fish lips, saying 'I love you' just cause it's the right thing to say in a relationship. No! I don't want to have to eat Chinese every single time we're having take out, or have only movie dates or count the seconds while you're kissing me. We want you to excite us, keep us on our toes, make yourself and the relationship unpredictable. No one wants a bored relationship, that's why people cheat or look for the silliest excuse to start a fight or even break up. The romantic aspect of love shouldn't have an expiry date; it should be like running a race, you don't start out fast and get people excited cause eventually you would tire out, you need to balance your energy as with love. Never let the flame go out. 
Not to sound biased I know we girls aren't perfect either, at the beginning we show interest in football and video games and other 'boy' things to get your attention and all of a sudden we no longer share those interests. So in a way the bored theory works for both parties. Ladies if you need to keep up with your appearance to not lose his interest then you have to make that sacrifice or he'll be off to some bimbo while you're bored at home watching How Harry Met Sally for the 100th time with a big tub of Ben and Jerry's.
If you're not trying anymore, your relationship is dying. It's as simple as that.
Inspired by Salamatu Yusuf 

Sunday, 5 February 2012

The Confused Heart

I don't know if you watch the series; Being Erica but I randomly do, like when I walk  into a room and it's on. Anyway today's episode was about Erica who had just realised that the man her sister was about to marry in a couple of hours wasn't the right choice of groom and she had to go back in time and try to stop her sister from getting back with the boyfriend from the first time they broke up.And so she travels back in time only for the boyfriend, turned fiancĂ©, to tell her that he doesn't really love the sister but it's always been Erica he wanted and then he finishes of with ' the heart wants what the heart wants'.

That line got me thinking, it's obviously not the first time I've heard it, but today I saw that phrase in a different limelight. I don't get the heart, nope not one bit; it forces us to act sometimes when reason tells us otherwise, it can tear down walls as well as build one around itself, it crosses the line most times and leads us to places the head would never go to; either for good or for worse. Why didn't they teach us this in biology? None of my teachers told me the heart could get broken or make stupid decisions even when the brain says otherwise, all they taught me was it pumping blood and all that. They need to check that curriculum again. Sometimes you find yourself faced with a dilemma and you're told "follow your heart" but that doesn't help because the problem is most times we know what we don't want but hardly ever do we know what we really want. This causes me to ask, what does the heart really want?