Tuesday, 28 May 2013

A Mother's Love

A friend of mine once asked me if I was ready to be a mother and without a hesitation in the world I said YES. People who know me, know I suffer from a severe case of baby fever. But being a mum is work. It's everything and then some. It changes everything. From your body to your outlook on the world. 

When you conceive a baby, your life changes. There's no you, no career, no selfishness. Your world revolves around that baby. Providing for the baby, taking care of the baby, loving the baby. Diaper changes, midnight duty, putting up with adolescent attitude, giving up everything for them. For the next 18 years your life hits the pause button hard, and for some it's longer than 18. Panic, anxiety and worry become your three best friends from every dance recital to every football game. To bicycle rides and learning to drive a car. From the company they keep to the social events they attend. You worry, that they might break a bone or not return. That you might lose them someday, you worry constantly. 

And then they grow up and you pray to God that all you've taught them is enough to sustain them in the world. To guide their path and help them choose who they want to be. You teach them your religion, drag them to church or islamiya and make them say the grace at dinner. But they grow up and decide what relationship they want with God. And sometimes accepting that they are adults is about the hardest thing you can do. Because it seems like just yesterday that you held their tiny little fingers in your hands. 

A mothers love conquers all they say. You bring life into earth and watch it grow. You watch em disconnect with you and hopefully rebuild their relationship with you once again. You watch them make mistakes, you rebuke them, disapprove of their choices but you can't decide who they should be. So whatever the outcome, you have to love them nonetheless. Lawyer, doctor, smart, slow, cranky, beautiful, physically impaired, you've still got to love them. Why? Because a mothers love conquers all. 

So if I'm asked the question again, in a heartbeat I'd say yes. My mother made the same choice and I would be most honoured to be bestowed with such a responsibility and I pray that you too can❤

Extra! Extra! Read all about it

Tell All books. We've seen our favourite celebrities even our least favourites write one. Expose every detail of their life or at least a little of everything. Might not be glamorous in some bits. Might offend some, ruin relationships or foster them. Or even strengthen current relationships. It requires digging into the deepest darkest pit of our memory and revealing our most intimate thoughts and actions. It has its consequences like it has its perks. It leaves no stone unturned, no skeletons in the closet. Once it's out there, your life becomes black and white. And every stranger, family, friend and enemy knows not just who you are but who you REALLY are.  But I guess that's the problem with having something to say. Not everyone is going to like what they hear or in this case read. 

I wonder, if the time comes, would I ever write a tell all book? Hmmmmm

Sunday, 26 May 2013


Ever just sat and watched people? Probably when you just didn't feel like saying/doing anything and happened to be in a social gathering wih friends. Ever taken a moment to sit and observe people?

You'd be amazed what you notice. Truly amazed and then you really discover more about the people you thought you knew. Or not. But try it. Sit and watch. You'd be truly amazed to notice those two with hidden feelings for each other or the shifty one or the one who just secretly eats everything hoping no one notices them or the attention seeker. You see them all when you sit back and look. 


Socially Awkward?

Am I the only one who finds certain social gatherings awkward? Like dinners were people, supposedly friends, gather to eat at the expense of another?
And there they sit, fiddling with their glass, food, hair. Or maybe replying imaginary messages. Or maybe calling people you suddenly remembered you hadn't heard from in a while just so you had an excuse to leave the table and skip out on the awkwardness? Lol. 

And what happens when people talk amidst themselves, forming little circles of conversations? Does that make it more awkward or does it count as people making conversations? Then what happens when you so happen to not have a little circle to converse with and have one on each side of yours. There you sit with your phone typin your next blog post like me

Thursday, 23 May 2013

Letter to My Unborn Daughter 2

Hi Angel,

Disappointments.... What's life without them? Your aunt always said 'Never expect anything", that's the key to avoiding disappointment. That would mean living a life of little or no hope and not believing in so many things to avoid disappointments. But what kind of mother would I be if I advised you to take that lifestyle up, just so you don't feel the etching betrayal of disappointments? What kind of mother would I be if I told you not to love, not to dream, not to dare because you would get disappointed at some point in your life. That your dreams may be harder to achieve, that the person you love would let you down, that risking it would have consequences? I couldn't possibly do that.

One thing I can say however, is no matter the disappointment, you've got to bounce back. You've got to move on. Would it be easy? No. If you don't get that job, you might feel discouraged, pray about it. If he breaks your heart, you wouldn't rush to put yourself out there, I understand. Hurt for sometime and find your healing then get back up and move on. If your business venture crashes, then maybe it wasn't meant to be or it was preparing you to build something bigger and better. In every disappointment, there is a lesson hidden. Not everything would work your way, there would be ups and downs, upsy turvy, discouragements, frustrations and most of all disappointments. I may disappoint you at some point. Don't let it get you down baby, learn your lesson and move on. Cause if you stay in that same spot, upset and hopeless, life may come and pass you by....


Safe Haven

Safe Haven
The one place you run to when you want to escape the world
Escape your demons, past and present
Escape the voices in your head
Escape the daily crap you would put up with on a normal day

A place to breathe
A place to sit in silence or sleep
A place where you feel secure
A place with no worries or drama
No one or thing to upset you

Could be a person, a book or a place, even a song
Does it matter what form it takes?
It could be your closet or the beach
What matters most is how secure you feel
In that place, in that moment with that person or thing

Safe Haven
A place where the world can't get to you
When you're running from everything and everyone
What are you running to?
For me, it's you...

Tuesday, 21 May 2013

Emotional Claustrophobia

Have you ever had days when you just couldn't put up with anymore bullshit?

Felt like you were choking in your own world? Felt like you couldn't breathe? Like the air around you felt contaminated? Contaminated with bull shit?

Days when you want to log out of every social network account you know? Days when you want to switch off your phone for at least a day?

No calls no text no contact with the outside world. Just lock yourself up and breathe. Breathe in serenity. Breathe in peace. Breathe in silence. Just you and you alone.   

Diagnosed with emotional claustrophobia? Take a breather. Escape the world or lose your sanity. Screaming helps. Just so you know. It does. If you don't want attention scream into your pillow. Break something. Nothing valuable. Take a bath or swim. Olivia Pope swims. Walking is my go to medication. 

Who is going to clean that up?

Sitting down in Costa treating myself to a yummy cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows and cream, I began people watching. No it's not creepy. 

And then I noticed this man trying to put sugar in his coffee and mistakenly spilt it everywhere on the floor. He was well upset and confused between cleaning himself up and the floor. I was going to offer him another cup but the kind ladies at the counter brought him a replacement. And then another came round to the crime scene and cleaned up. I watched her quietly and diligently try to soak up the coffee with the mop. Before proceeding to clean the surfaces. All the while with a blank look on her face. Couldn't tell what she was thinking. She didn't look upset though. I could tell it was something she was used to. Cleaning up people's messes that is. Must be frustrating, cleaning up after people all the time... 

And most of us were like the man. Not that we go round costa's spilling coffee but making mistakes in life and leaving the cleaning up for others. Our mums, sisters, friends or the next president, we automatically leave the cleaning to them. I wonder how much better the world would be if everyone just cleaned up after theirselves or their dogs...

Monday, 20 May 2013

Finding my voice

All I ever wanted was your approval. To make you happy. To make you proud. That's all I ever wanted. 

I never meant to hurt you. No I never meant to disappoint you either. I lost myself. I saw the world and I lost myself. 

Now everytime you look at me I see the disappointment. I see the hurt. I chose the life you didn't want for me. I hurt you. I hurt you, can you forgive me?

Now I'm trying to find my way back to the little girl you once loved. The little girl you held in high esteem. The little girl you always beamed at with pride. Will I ever be that girl? Would I ever find redemption? Will I ever find my way back? These are the demons I struggle with but I'm trying.

Trying so hard to be that girl for you once again before this lifetime is done. I never wanted to disappoint you, I hope you know. But I'm trying to find my way back and I'm trying to find my voice...


Reflections... They can be pretty scary especially when the person you see staring back at you isn't what or who you want to see or you don't recognise them at all. 

Sometimes you stare in the mirror and you see someone. Probably the person you really are or the person the world wants you to be. But sometimes you stare in the mirror and you just don't know who the person staring back is. It's scary, to look in the mirror and not recognise your own reflection. 

In that black and white moment. When it's just you and the mirror. Not the world, no one with you, who do you see in the mirror? Is it someone you know?

Sunday, 19 May 2013

Glimmer of Innocence

From time to time Beau accuses me of being a little child, which I am not going to dispute. I still wear head bands (bunny ears to be specific), have a poster of disney princesses in my room, I still watch Disney. And when I visited Disneyland this year, I was crying when Mickey Mouse kissed me on the cheek. Let's just say I left a couple of kids stunned..

What can I say? In my defence I think everyone should still have a small child in them. Because that's their glimmer of innocence. In a cruel and unfair world, where poverty, diseases and corruption coexist, any little glimmer of innocence should be preserved. And childhood, well that's one form of innocence that's becoming as distinct as dinosaurs. I mean 10 year olds holding smartphones, clad in expensive clothes and make up, 13 year olds having sex, 16 year old mums. You see where I'm coming from? I think that no matter how old we get, we should still have that thing/object/hobby we glee for with child like excitement like football or a song or cars or a character. Being a grown up well it's a female dog and there's something so subtle and carefree about childhood that I keep going back to. Like it's my safe haven, those childlike things I hold on to, it's pretty much all I have left.

So 21 or not, would I still squeal when I see Mickey Mouse? Hell Yeah. I'll still wear my bunny slippers and wear my Minnie nightie (that was a gift, don't judge me), watch cartoons and animation with the concentration of a 3 year old and have more teddies on my bed than Hamley's. And if that makes me a big baby then cheers, I still have a glimmer of innocence in me.


P.s If you find someone in their clear 40/50s still acting like a child, there's a difference. I said glimmer not the whole 9 yards :p

Fairytale Dreams

Since we were little we were thought to chase our dreams and believe in love. If you wanted something, you held on to that dream and you chased it, Cinderella dreamed a better life she got it, Ariel wanted a life on land, adamantly, and she got it and recently in Tangled, Rapunzel wished to see the festival of lights and made that happen just as Tiana got her dream restaurant; Tiana's Palace. So you see from a young age, we've been encouraged to chase two things; dreams and love, except if your dream is love, in which case it's one thing for you.

And some of us well we had a dream, we had a purpose, to be a model, to be a doctor, to be a fireman, we all had a dream at some point in our lives. Along the way it just got harder, either lost vision or motivation. Or lost sight of our dreams. Perhaps we didn't get the support we needed or the going was just too tough. What happens when you no longer have a dream? Do you just exist with no purpose and watch your friends chase their dreams?

I was recently filling a form that said "what is your ambition"? I was stuck. I kept staring at the blank space where I was supposed to write a mini essay. And so I told myself to fill other parts of the form and get back to that initial question. Which I did but it made no difference because I still had no answer. It scared me a bit, still does. Am I ambitionless? I'm not lazy I know that. But I still struggle with what career I want. Ambassador? Writer? Events Planner? I can't seem to make up my mind. And the more I look at the sand in the hour glass, the more I'm reminded that time isn't exactly a luxury I own. The only thing which keeps me going is well Jeremiah 29:11 to be honest.

Quotes from Disney Movies that encourage you, no matter how old you are:

"If you keep believing the dreams that you wish will come true" - Cinderella

"You're braver than you think, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think"

"You'll never know unless you try"

"Today is a good day to try"

"The path to your destiny lies within your heart" 

"The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing"

"Don't just fly, soar"

"Believe you can, then you will"

"All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them"

"Life is not a spectator sport. If watching is all you're gonna do, then you're gonna watch your life go by without ya" - The hunchback of Notre Dame

Friday, 17 May 2013

Gloomy Skies and Snuggly Blankets

I am disappointed... Yes well upset. I left the sun, beach and night life in Barcelona to return to London's bipolar weather. I mean it's mid May, what do we have to do Mother Nature, some sacrifice? what would it take to get the sun and not the rain? :(

Anyways the weather doesn't look so great so I've been indoors, in bed actually. Been catching up on all the TV series I had to give up during school peak period. It's been an interesting morning, first Vampire Diaries left me with misty eyes and Scandal had me dropping my jaws. Next is Revenge, heard Emily/Amanda's been up to some mischief of her own. Let's see.

Before I forget, I'm sadly a busy bee sometimes. And it's already driving me insane that I don't have work to do. I need a project to take on, as I'm sadly not the most creative person walking this earth, my choices are limited. Anyone with a good idea please hit me up. One more lazy day and I'd crack. 

Wednesday, 15 May 2013

Dirty Laundry

Ever looked in your closet and gone 'wow that's a whole load of skeletons', yup we all have skeletons, some a little more than others. Anyways after making dinner for friends, I needed something else to do while they chatted over football and I opened up all my social networks; instagram, twitter and path. Noticed everyone going on o and on about this new single by Kelly Rowland; Dirty Laundry so I quickly opened a new tab for YouTube and gave the song a good listen.

I'm probably on my 20th replay in the past hour, yes it's that good regardless of the negative comments some are tweeting, people would always give out bad energy anyways. Dirty Laundry is as real and true as it can get. Imagine a clean slate, baring you soul out, a clean slate where everyone can peer into your deepest thoughts, deepest fears, the ones you took time trying to hide or surpress. And then all of a sudden, you bare it all. That's dirty laundry, she dug deep into her soul for this one. It's not the greatest track of course, but it's real and transparent.

And that's what I admire, her ability to bare her soul on a track about her insecurity, her true feelings about Beyonce's success and an abusive relationship. Got me thinking of some dirty laundries of mine. Nothing is ever as it seems.

When you wear pain this good, it never airs out

Saturday, 11 May 2013

When You Know, You Know...

Beau once accused me of being a hopeless romantic, not that I dispute that fact but there are some love stories that get you, regardless. And I came across one today that has got me still wiping tears from my eyes, even as I type this.

Jamie and Nikki, saw the video on my Facebook timeline and I just really wanted to be deep in love and get married. I kept picturing myself in my head being the happiest girl on earth, while secretly envying Nikki. I don't know their love story, you could google it or watch their wedding video here or below this post (whichever makes you happy), make sure you have some kleenex close by. The one thing that struck me so much about the wedding was the way he looked at her, there was just something in the look that let you know that was true love. He had that look that says I'll still love you when you've added 20 kg or I'll love you anyways even if you keep driving me mad, the look that assures you he was ready for love, full on love and commitment. And I pray that love never fades away or that he never looks at another woman that way. That's the look that lets you know that you know. That you finally know who you want to spend the rest of your life with, that you know whose bull you're ready to put up with and still love anyday and everyday for the rest of your life.

And I pray that we all find that someone who looks at us the same way, I think I'm going to call it the 'knowing look'. Yup, so if you find someone who looks at you that way, hold on to them (except if you don't feel the same way, then that's just sad). And I'm going to take my hopeless ass to bed, after some social networking. Did you catch the latest episode of Scandal?? All I can say is WHAT????!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, 10 May 2013

Peace and Serenity

I wrote my finals today and that's it, I am officially done with Undergraduate. Thank you Jesus. Another thing I'm thankful for? Chamomile tea!! It saved my sanity during the worst days of my life. I had a cup before my exam and I was stupidly calm, I thought I had been tranquilized. While my friends were panicking and doing last minute reading, I found myself in Lotus Yoga Position on the floor, grinning like a fool. They probably thought I was high... LOL

Anyways that's that, it's over, moving on to better days. Barcelona in a couple of hours, not sure if I'd be able to blog from there but I promise you lots of pretty pictures to make you jealous. I am currently packing and I'm so pleased to say that the only dark colour in my box are my black leggings, every other article is a rainbow colour. Yippeeeee. Finally somewhere with some sun.

Somewhere in the world it's 11th already, Dubai to be exact. It's my darlings birthday; Zara Dilli, one of my best mates. I love her soo much and it sucks that I can't be with her but I wish her all the best. She's a shining star and I hope she never forgets that. Happy Birthday Zara (if you read my blog lol). I love you to the moon and back.

Bye loves, just incase you don't hear from me in the next 5 days then I'm having too much of a swell time in Barcelona. One thing I look forward to other than the sun is the eye candies in that beautiful city, oh the handsome spanish men *drooling*. Sorry Beau, you're still my number 1 *muaaaah*

Thursday, 9 May 2013

Rowntree's Randoms and Bruno Mars

I should be reading for my final exam tomorrow, the last hurdle to cross till I am officially done with Undergrad but I'm sitted here in the library downing Rowntree's Randoms Jelly and listening to When I Was Your Man by Bruno Mars on repeat, which I only fell in love with today after watching the most adorable kid perform this song on Ellen DeGeneres. It's so sweet, if you don't awww at some point or dry your eyes then I know you've got some serious emotional issues.

Notice I've given the blog a new look? Yeah that's how distracted I got, so much for finals. And what's with the gloomy weather again? Come on England!! it's May. On the plus side I'm going to Barcelona on Saturday and I've kept a keen eye on my weather app making sure the temp doesn't drop below 20 degrees. Just how I manage to do this, I don't know. Which reminds me I need to pack. I got this really pretty yellow dress from Ax Paris that I just can't wait to wear *childish grin*

Oh and seeing as I'm going to be away, Beau came to see me in the library, whose idea of a lunch date is McDonald's. He's awesome I tell you, he does the strangest things sometimes that you have no choice but to awwww at. But anyway I am going to see him tomorrow and really if he takes me to McDonalds I'm going to buy him a romantic handbook. I'm sure there's one on eBay. Romance for dummies, no?

Well well wish me luck for my finals tomorrow. It's quite a tricky module and currently everyone on this floor is studying for the same exam and looks just as frustrated as I was before I saw Beau.


Wednesday, 8 May 2013

How Thick is Your Skin?

Certain sitch in life make you develop a thick skin, like being bullied in junior school or being picked upon cause you're different and not society's definition of beauty (I should someday comment on how society ruins us). As you get older, life forces you to develop a thick skin in one way or the other. Cause people talk, all the time, and sometimes what they say isn't always nice. Everyone has some opinion about your weight, your look, your attitude, your choices, something about you which maybe at some point struck a nerve but then you got used to it along the way. 

I started watching Private Practise not long ago, late comer I know. I love Charlotte and I love her relationship with Cooper too. She eludes the strength that most women need to get by in this life. I always thought she was the most stubborn TV character till she started showing vulnerability with Cooper and it made me realise this. No matter how thick your skin is, when it comes to people you care about, there's always an inch left for vulnerability. Why am I saying this?

Well beau is kind of an asshole you see. I love him, don't get me wrong but he's the type to drive you insane by teasing you and looking for trouble and sometimes saying insensitive things. And I try to not let it get to me all the time but sometimes I just wanna shake him and say "What is wrong with you?" Certain things you can take from the world and just don't give a damn but when someone you care about does the same thing it infuriates you cause you expect them to be your safe haven. The last place to have to put on a brave face with. 

Anyways I was just randomly sharing a thought not that beau has done anything today, I'm sure he did something yesterday LOL. As you were 


Top 20 Mistakes to Avoid in Your 20s

You would be surprised what you'd find on twitter... LOL who am I kidding. There's no surprise in these social networks anymore. But I came across this great read on someone's TL and I just had to share with my faithful SD readers. The 20 Mistakes You Don't Want To Make In Your 20s by Adam Hayes is a great

read and would inspire so many people, even if you're no longer in your 20s. I've probably made one or two of these mistakes but I'm going to regroup and prioritise the right way. Favourite quotes from the article:

On relationships: "Your 20s are entirely too crucial for your personal growth for you to be focusing on fulfilling the wish of another individual" ( I seem to blog a lot on relationships, hmmmmm)

"Just because you think trust someone doesn't always mean you can"

"Distinguish between what you want and what you actually need"

"Family comes first no matter what happens"

"At the end of the day, all you have in this world is yourself"

"You can be aware of the trends but never follow them"

"Friends and family could have been great to you as a child, but if they no longer hold the value and inspiration for you to thrive in life, cut them loose"

"Be a good person, you will get further in life"

7 inspiring quotes to say the least, caught in a traffic jam? bored at work? Waiting for your movie to buffer? Take the time to read the article, it would change your life - at least something about your life. One more thing, I know it may come off as a bit sexist, considering it was written from a male point of view and women were only referred to in sex advice, but you write about what you know right? There are still some general rules that apply to all. Don't get offended.

Take Care

Sunday, 5 May 2013

Sunday with Khloe Kardashian

I wonder how your sunday evening is going, mine is pretty good actually. I was randomly stalking people on twitter yesterday and went on Khloe's page and noticed she was going to be gracing the cover of Cosmopolitan UK this month and felt the need to get the magazine.

I don't watch Keeping up with the Kardashian's or any reality show, in fact the one time I watched an episode of the Kardashians was when my friend was making my hair and she and her sisters wanted it on. Every single time Kim's voice came over the speakers I cringed... well that's not why I'm here.

I was drawn to Khloe (I know that sounds weird) but she was created to be different, to stand out (literally) and she's doing that. Even though I know nada about the Kardashians (cause I just can't be bothered), there's something about Khloe that makes you want to like her. At first I felt bad for her cause you know she's bigger than her sisters and society just reigns on your parade when you don't fit into its definition of 'beauty' but I started reading this interview and knew I had found my confidence role model. 

She made so many confessions from sibling rivalry to body critics, starting a family, her marriage whirwind and so many other things. I would tell you all about it but that would kill Cosmopolitan's market and I don't want any law suit -_-

But there are two things she said that inspired me the most and they had to do with relationships.

Number 1 is for people who let relationships define them, "I never felt a guy defined me. I liked being single and getting to know myself". GBAM!! I've been singing this for as long as I can remember. People think I'm just consoling myself in the forever alone zone but honestly, life isn't so bad as a single person. You discover so much not just about yourself but your world. Some of you just behave like if you're not in a relationship, your world is over. Tell me, when they gave birth to you did you come into this world with a boyfriend/girlfriend?

Number 2 is for everyone, single, committed or aspiring to be, "The more you involve other people, the more you bring out the negative", she's referring to privacy in relationships. Bless her for saying this. I just recently noticed how much I value privacy with my relationships and sort of wished certain people did as well. I mean there's nothing wrong with throwing a cute picture on instagram once in a while and referring to them in a tweet or two. But when I begin to know when your beau is in the toilet too?!!! caman!!! draw a line. The less people who know about your business, the better. Not everyone is out for your happiness, not even family! You gotta know just how much into your private life (RELATIONSHIPS) you let people peek. I assure you one thing, misery does love company, not everyone is genuinely interested in seeing you happy and sometimes people just want to destroy a good thing. 

Y'all should get the magazine, it's worth the read and just £2. Plus there are a couple more articles that could benefit you, fashion, love and sex. Now as you were. Oh and have a wonderful week ahead, if you're in London, the weather is going to be awesome tomorrow and it's Bank Holiday. Wooooohoooo.

Toodles xxx

Saturday, 4 May 2013

Have an Audrey Marathon

Chances are you have nothing better to do with your saturday, why not have an Audrey marathon and spend your afternoon laughing, wiping tears or falling in love. So here's a possible list you could follow in any order

  1. Breakfast at Tiffany's

  2. Love In The Afternoon 

  3. My Fair Lady 

    4. Roman Holiday 

    5. Sabrina 

    6. Funny Face 

    7. Charade 

    8. Two For The Road 

    9. The Nun's Story  

    10. How To Steal A Million 

    Okay there you have it, my ten favourite in no particular order except well number 1 had to be number 1. Enjoy your Hepburn filled saturday. Kisses

An Ode to a Legend: Audrey Hepburn

So here I am on a saturday afternoon, I've cleaned out a whole portion of my closet (de-cluttering my life) and it's time to study but all I want to do is have a lazy saturday with the one whose name shall not be mentioned but I've decided to blog till the study mojo comes along.

It's Audrey's birthday!! woooop woooop. I love this lady, I'm not crazy about her like some people are, in fact I only started liking her about 2 years back from my best friend but It's hard not to love her, noble, beautiful and elegant. She's the type of lady every girl should aspire to be.

And everyday I wake up to this big poster from the famous scene in Breakfast at Tiffany's and it brightens up my day most times. A funny face she has indeed but she made us learn to embrace our imperfections. My favourite quote from that movie is "I don't want my eyebrows up or down, I want them right where they are". She got us falling in love with Tiffany's and dreaming of a life in New York. She made us believe in pink
and hold on to our fairytales just a little bit longer. She taught us to love, to let go of our fear of falling and just do it; Love. And in nobility, she did charity work that has inspired people and changed lives. She made us leave our hearts in Paris and dream of a day when we could all go there because well "Paris is always a good idea". Then she tiptoed round our closets and made us all purchase an item of pearls; earrings, bracelet, necklace, if not all. But best of all, she made us laugh more because "Happy girls are the prettiest" and cause laughing is the best calorie burner and a cure for a multitude of ills. She left a legacy, a legacy not to be forgotten 50 years from now or ever. And when I have daughters of my own, I hope to God that Audrey would be the kind of role model they would look up to.

So Happy Birthday Audrey, you impacted our lives so much and saved some of us from being drag queens or a horrible version of ourselves. And in your honour I'm going to be having an Audrey marathon starting with my all time favourite; Breakfast at Tiffany's and then Love in the Afternoon ( I should probably make a list of my ten best Audrey movies, maybe).

Thursday, 2 May 2013

Main Dish: Tuwon Shinkafa

So I'm meant to be studying for an exam and I got carried away in my thoughts. I started thinking about home; Nigeria and in particular the dating life, because well we have reached that stage where you're done with uni so you're technically allowed to date according to Nigerian timing. It was so random, I know but hear me out. 

I was wondering just how different it is to the West, I wouldn't know cause last time I was home I wasn't at the dating stage. Having experienced the dating life in London, going on lunch dates, movie dates, formal dinner dates, park dates, the whole experience how do you transition into that same routine in Nigeria.

Is it millenium Park you would go and take a walk in with your beau? Or silverbird where those younglings have taken over? or for some people that life feeling romantic with candlelit home cooked meals for two, is it in your father's house that you would begin to do that one?

Imagine, after enjoying steak and rosemary potatoes or filet mignon and the rest, you go back home and start serving tuwon shinkafa da miyan kuka as main dish for your lover. Even the candles sef, when I start lighting them up my mother would just laugh and ask 'is it ritual you're doing?' because face it at 20, 21 you are still in your father's house. So enjoy your cosy urban flats while you may because your father's house awaits you in Abuja. 

And think about all those romantic gestures we so often lavish ourselves with, bouquet of roses, hotel getaways, spa dates. I'm sorry but in my head romance and Nigeria just don't mix, I don't know why. Thinking about it makes me want to cry sef.

Anyways I'm not trying to be a killjoy or anything. I know we're evolving and have modern restaurants like Tulip Bistro and all those other fancy places in Lagos but transitioning is going to be hard and frustrating! And I so don't look forward to that :(